This is a family favorite. It is age-old — cultivated over many past lives and tested and revised over several genetic lines. It takes effort but it is one of those items that, when you bring it to the party, provokes (among those who find they enjoy it) warm smiles, comments and requests for the recipe. Once the recipe is shared, however, you know that few people will go make it — a lot of people just like to eat it and remember it, while under their breath, as you share the recipe, and they smile, they say “who do you think I am Betty F*&%$@# Crocker?”
Once in a decade or so though, someone takes the recipe in their hands, folds it carefully, puts it in their pocket, and when they get home, slides it into the front plastic sleeve of their favorite cookbook … eager to spend time with its components over a weekend, a week, a month, a year, a half decade, maybe … just maybe, a lifetime.
The recipe is versatile in that it will still turn out beautifully when substitutions are made for allergies and upgrades are applied based on new health knowledge … so long as the cook understands how these edits apply to the whole process.
Preheat the oven to a temperature that can cook the cakes within an hour — a lot of heat but not so much that they cook through evenly, there has to be some sophistication to the end product: so that they are moist yet have lovely frost-worthy tops … you wait for them, but they are worth it.
•Two cups of ant-grade will power and strength
•A quarter cup of sweetness
•Two cups of consideration
•(Balanced by) an eight of a cup of hesitation
•An eighth of a cup of assertiveness
•An eighth of a cup of escapism
•A cup of vulnerable expression — dance, art, song, improve, joking, taking the stage in any way shape or form
•Two cups of writing expression, as an author, peeking out from behind words that people may or may not read and ignoring whether or not they do
•Three cups of passion
•Enough sentiment to get the whole mix to a consistency where you can put it into a cupcake pan … not as runny as pancake batter, more like cake batter*
*This is about measuring the right amount of sentiment so that it isn’t like pancake batter, running all over, but instead clumps, sticks, drops in dollops into the cupcake pan
~~~~Start out with a bit of sentiment and wet the hesitation along with a cup of the consideration into a paste, blend half of of the sweetness and half of the expressive writing until you have a thick dough.
~~~~Add sentiment and a half of escapism so that the whole mix can set the first time.
~~~~Cover the mix with a clean towel and put in a warm place so that it can breath and expand a bit. It will not rise but something is happening so you just have to trust these breaks for their alchemical reasons. Go for a walk for about a half hour to remember what the last conversations were.
~~~~Come back and add all of the assertiveness, the other half of the sweetness, half of the vulnerable expression and about a cup of the passion. Add a bit more sentiment so it’s not dry and crumbly, but still pasty. Add the rest of the escapism.
~~~~Cover and warm it for setting again as you go watch a funny movie.
~~~~Return and add the rest of the escapism, expressive writing, half of the will power and a bit more sentiment to encourage the paste. Add another cup of passion and the rest of the vulnerable expression. Mix with some sentiment so that it reaches a paste again.
~~~~Cover one last time for its warm, breathing time and find your nearest experience of nature and frolic there for at least two hours. Return and add the rest of the passion, consideration, will power and enough sentiment to get to a cake batter consistency.
Spray the pan with a nonstick spray so that the mix can easily escape from the intense heat when finished otherwise it will become dry and when cooled it will be like nothing ever happened. You will find the mix fills each of the cupcake basins nicely and evenly to the top. Bake it in the hot, hot oven of life for 25 minutes and remove. You can test with a knife but be gentle.
Frosting recipe (this is optional because the cakes are sweet themselves, but some people like things to last in their mouth — like something that carries on, and haunts them, something they want to put more effort in so that they can go back to again and again — and this frosting will ensure it)
A cup of sincerity
A cup of sweetness
A cup of rich, meaningful expression
A dash of compliments
Two tablespoons of truth — raw, organic
Mix first the compliments with the raw truth so that the two are like one spice and neither is unevenly distributed in the frosting. Mix this mixture with the meaningful expression. Add other two ingredients and whip, playfully.