This is a response to a writing prompt: Imagine the world is ending in 24 hours--how would it be ending and what would you do?
The world would be ending because scientists would spontaneously discover that it was about to drift out of orbit and lose its relationship with the sun. We would all experience subzero temps within seconds. Everything would crystallize as mother Earth would careen through space, with frozen bits of all of us dotting her surface, floating around, until one day ensnared by another star in another one of billions of existent and proven galaxies.
The last 24 hours would first involve phone calls and messages to people I love and care about who are not within proximity, brave assertions that I would not otherwise make. Communication channels would be jammed, flights grounded, so I would try but likely fail in many ways to reach people. I would find the sea and get in. On the way to the sea, I would respond to anyone I could, and (as anyone would admit) if there was a chance to copulate I would do it, with someone I cared about superficially or otherwise, and who cared about me enough to show it, nicely. I would be fearless and expressive of love and work intently on making an impression that would carry through to their next life. I would also want to join with groups of people and show a lot of affection, perhaps akin to the aforementioned, and talk about all the things we were embarrassed to say to anyone, and share secrets and feel this explosion of truth and forgiveness among all of us happening, because somehow all of our paradigms would shift, the way the body does when it is on the brink of a near-fatal accident … the shock, the adrenaline, all these things come together to eliminate pain and fear and set us firmly into the present, which folds like an accordion and opens just the same.
I would scream in the air that I forgive my former bitchy colleague who thought that just because I was nice that I was naive, and just because I didn’t argue with her that she wasn’t hurting me, until that one day when all she got from me again was radio silence, and that judgemental friend who chose the most painful moment in my life to tell me that I made a bad decision and that she would like me to read a long list of reasons why, and the most irresponsible man I ever dated who to this day twists the Rubix cube of my logic into deeper levels of jagged patterns, and the second most irresponsible man I ever dated who sometimes writes to tell me he loves me and is there for me if I ever would like to visit him 20 YEARS LATER (wtf), and the guy who treated me like rubbish because he knew I was down on my luck and wouldn’t expect more so he just kept doing it for months until I wasn’t down on my luck and here I am with his sleazy hindsight behavior under my nose whenever he walks by, and the guy who stalked me and threatened my psyche with talk of me dying an old, single spinster because I didn’t want to settle down with the likes of him — he was so charming though, what was I thinking?!! You people were so good at playing the roll of dipshits but now the world is ending so you can drop the act — and again, I forgive you ALL!
I would call my family and ask for a group Skype session somehow and just be with them a bit and then turn us all loose and say “see you in the next life — you were incredible, you were everything, I would not be, without you.”
I would call the wealthy, devastatingly handsome man who courted me way too aggressively and tell him that I wished I could have loved him back, but he was too intense, and the energy was always way off, and that, if there was one thing I learned in my ex-marriage, which ended expensively due to pointless Manhattan therapists, it was that you shouldn’t get into something when the passion is not there, when the energy is just … off. You just shouldn’t. And I would blow him a kiss, and I would paint something risky risky, take otherwise naughty pictures and send them to people I was otherwise withholding them from until they showed me more commitment or effort.
I would send a Whatsapp message to the best lay of my life and tell him thank you for that experience as a human being on planet Earth and, no, I never did find better in that respect!
I would run around naked in public and wave the flag! I would then put something skimpy on and try to find the people who run cruel operations and participate in a loud shaming followed by spontaneous and joyful and tearful forgiveness session with them so that everyone’s karma stays at least at the same notch … and I would want to celebrate with workers and help them loot stores and gorge themselves and spread love to them too, and I would call my DJ friends who would certainly, by now, have gotten a massive desert rave started and I would hitch a ride or give a ride and then dance my ass off and show more affection, in public, and just lose all sense of boundaries and protection and ride the wave of consciousness as it rises and rises and rises in the spiral of truth and forgiveness and falling of the projectors as truths are admitted and owned and owned … not everyone would be riding this vibe — some might panic.
I would grab people and shake them awake and tell them there is nothing to do now but live — that is all that is going to happen, even 24 hours from now. I would shout out prophetically:
We are not going to die! We are about to be reunited! That our bodies will freeze and our brains will stop working and our hearts will stop beating and this elusive mass configuration will be gone forever, but so is YESTERDAY — gone forever. Somebody gets a haircut and that style is gone forever according to their face, at that exact age, with those exact levels of maturity. You get this amazing smoothie and you drink it and it is gone, and you will never be in that airport again most likely so how will you ever get that back?! Things are dying every day, every second, and at that same moment something else is born, and we just never admitted it so what the f*&^% is the difference now except it is bigger and more obvious?
The Earth is just getting a makeover, and we will be frozen off her face, and she will travel to a new dimension, and everything will flourish again if she finds a star — if not, there is plenty of flourishing going on in the big universe! I mean, there are too many galaxies to count by hand anymore, so astrophysicists are now working on software to try to keep up with what equipment can see out there. This is the truth according to my astrophysicist friend and many others working on software instead of staring into telescopes.
What makes us think we know anything beyond our little, tiny, speck of perception?! And what makes us think that this is the absolute end?! Our souls will never be in this form again; sure, mourn that, I can’t blame you. But if you have 24 hours left, how long do you want to spend in that related drugstore of emotions, and for what?! Be joyful that you are about to be spontaneously released into the light and return to that light, and that light will find its way to other universes and life forms and expressions of life, and it will latch into it and bind together — perhaps like it does here: two cells that become four and become tissues, or maybe, if your karma is really shitty, or great, just one celled amoebas … but you know … actually, no, you don’t know and that is the magic of it. THAT is the beauty of it! We finally get to admit that we don’t f*&^%# know what is going to happen.
Yet how chaotic too as the entirety of society realizes that all bets, ALL bets are off. And so, I hope I will have those 24 hours. Estimating the power of vengeance, a lot of people, probably won’t.
Finally, I know I would want to set aside at least an hour to sit still and go inside of the shell that surrounds myself for just a little while, to feel and somehow memorize it with a mind that is soon to evaporate. To let go of the memories, to see them for what they are, in the context of everything vanishing in a short time. I can only imagine, until I can’t, for this kind of situation would produce feelings and thoughts that could only occur if it actually happened. And yet, it was fun to go as far as I could into “what if,” just to get a sense of what is.